The leaves are starting to fall off the trees which means a new season, a new start. In theory. And its not only the weather that is getting colder...
I feel like a bit of a failiure at the moment. It has been months since I last wrote on here! I guess I was hoping if I don't write, then nothing is actually up. I don't have to admit to myself anything is wrong.
So where was I since I left off. Ah yes, The Breakup. Trololol looking back it all seems so stupid now. However, what happened had to be done. Yes it screwed me up for a while and I went on a whore-like spree for a few weeks after that, but its in the past. What happened happened and it can't be changed. Kind of glad I did what I did because now I just can't be bothered to get involved with anyone or do the chasing on purpose. That leads to hurt and hurt is bad... But oh wait, did I just say I can't be bothered to be involved with someone? My first BIIIIIIIG woop >.<
I came home from uni at the end of May and got in contact with an old friend, AC. We decided to meet up in London to have a needed catch up. It may have been one of the best weekends I have had in London. The thing is, what happened between us that night sparked something off. It was so unexpected, so well, oh I don't know! I guess I always wanted something to happen between us, but never had the balls to do anything about it. For the whole summer we met up once a month either in London or at mine, chilling, catching up, getting a personal tour or a trip to the Tate Modern, being best friends in our "friends and lovers" situation during the day and well, you know... It was going so well, I forgotten how it felt falling. Then I left for my second year at uni. Things change when someone moves away, that has always been the case. Yes I would get an occasional phone call but now? Nada. I sent a message over fb last Sunday, and normally I would get a response of equal length by the Thursday or something. I got a message on Thursday. It was however simply a funny photo of the back of a condom packet. Fabulous. Yet another black hole I have sucked myself into. Though it was to be expected from me. Start getting attached to something, and it won't be long till your guts get pulled out through your navel...
Aaaaaaand on that note, I shall leave this spiel here. You probably want to throw this screen at the wall in frustration I bet? I know I do. But this would not be advisable. My regular therapy sessions are back. Not sure if this is a good thing or not yet... Laters y'all
xxLMxx
